Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I lost my second pregnancy

I started bleeding last week at 9 DPO. It was way more that what anyone could imagine as implantation bleeding. It stopped as soon as it started. At 10 DPO I had one more instance of bleeding that again imediately stopped. It kept starting and stopping until 12 DPO.

13 and 14 DPO I didn't have any bleeding so I decided to POAS. I got a positive! I was pregnant! It was Friday so I called my doctor to schedule a beta for Monday morning.

I started spotting very faint pink discharge over the weekend. It was almost a watery red. I continued getting positive pregnancy tests but I didn't have a very good feeling.

When I was getting my blood drawn, the tech said, "You've been trying for awhile haven't you?"

"Do you have any children?"
"No." Crying now! Thanks!

Lynn, my doctor's nurse came by as we were finishing up. She asked me how things were going. I told her about the positive pregnancy tests but the continued spotting. I told her I was just so afraid my period was going to start. She asked me if I wanted to see the doctor. I didn't know since there wasn't much he could do for me. But she and the tech both thought I should. I guess tears running down your face helps in getting an appointment and moving to the head of the line.

My beta on Monday was only 10 at 17 DPO. So I was at least clinically pregnant and get to "count" this as m/c number 2. (Oh the joy!)

I had got a faint positive (really squinting and tilting the FRER) that morning and a negative one Tuesday. My period started Tuesday at 18 DPO. It's pretty heavy with a lot of cramping.

Today I was scheduled for the second beta but it was pointless. My doctor talked to DH and I for a long time. I asked for a reaccurring pregnancy loss panel and my doctor told me we'd do all the bloodwork testing on myself and my husband, including karotyping. I was surprised how easy my doctor agreed to start testing since I've heard others having difficulty. I'm 36 so I guess that helps get things going. My doctor also mentioned doing a HSG. He left during the consultation so he could go dictate my treatment plan so we have a permanent record. (I have a treatment plan!) He returned and gave me a big hug and shook my husband's hand. The doctor really spent a lot of time discussing the various clotting disorders and structural problems possible.
I have to wait a month to get the testing started. My doctor said he wanted to make sure this pregnancy didn't affect some of the clotting blood work. So, that's that for now.

We're going to take a TTC break which is probably not a bad idea anyway since I've lost two since June.Hopefully it's just bad luck that I've had two losses. BUT I'll be glad to know that we have some of the testing out of the way. Overall I'm hanging in there. I've cried off and on the past few days but I knew this pregnancy wasn't starting off very good last week. So it was kind of expected.

But this certainly is not the journey I expected when we set the date to begin TTC. I figured we'd TTC for 6 months and go directly to a RE, do not pass Go and do not collect $200. Maybe I should start playing Monopoly, since I have some free time this next month. I need a new hobby since POAS and chart obsessing are out for the time being.