This isn't working

The two Clomid cycles have been a waste.

The first cycle the IUI was 48 hours post trigger because we did a Post Coital Test at 24 hours. Awful timing. A single IUI should be at 36 hours post trigger shot. So not much chance of that one working from the get go after the failed PCT.

The second Clomid cycle it looks like I ovulated on CD 10 based on when my period started. I didn't start using OPK that cycle until after my u/s on CD 11. My nurse had assured me that it wasn't neccessary. Of course I kicked myself for not starting it sooner. We didn't even have sex until CD 10 that cycle. My lining was thin on CD 11 so there probably wasn't a chance even if we'd had timed intercourse before. Then I ended up with 9 cysts on my ovaries which required us to take a break cycle. After enduring the progestin hell, I'm taking stock of our situation.

So, the two medicated cycles have been a big bust. That's three wasted cycles.

We TTC on our own, for three unmedicated cycles and got pregnant twice. And miscarried twice of course.

So the score is:

Medicated cycles: 0-3
Unmedicated cycles: 2-3

Hmmm? Yeah. It's like that.


We both work for the same company and I feel like we've burned up some of their good graces by all the days we've already asked off for testing and procedures. We travel for work and a doctor appointment requires a complete day off.


There's been 5 firings in the past two days so I'm afraid to push our luck and jeopardize our jobs right now by asking for 2-3 days off for monitoring and IUI. Since they want to start doing follicle checks on CD 8 because of my early ovulation on Clomid, it might take two appointments before I could trigger. Then a third day would be required for the IUI. It's just getting too stressful right now.


I'm leaning towards taking a cycle or two off to TTC on our own without Clomid or IUI. There's no medical reason that we can't. It's only my age and thus questionable eggs that are bad quality which could be the reason for the miscarriages. But my hormones and his sperm are all normal.

TTC on our own with just the CBEFM and some Presed will reduce the stress level by 90%. It will also give me time to allow the accupunture to work. I have my first appointment on Monday!

Then we can do another cycle or two of Clomid/IUI before starting injectibles. That would be around May. We plan to stop traveling in May. I may have a different job by then.

Before we do injects, I would need to be home any way because the monitoring is a lot more often. I think you almost have to go every other day as they change your injectible dosage.

So we're going back to basics. I would be thrilled to death if I got pregnant again with a sticky baby. Of course the second I get pregnant again, I'll be scared to death. But I'd rather be pregnant and scared than unpregnant without hope.

I have a baseline u/s on Monday. I'm going to spring our plan on my nurse and see what she has to say.

I have an expensive habit.

I'm addicted.

I'm a junkie.

Pee sticks.

They haunt me.

I'm missing my ovulation.

I need my fix!


I'm on CD 19 and still no positive or peak. I'm really frustrated with this Clomid cycle and resulting cyst. I think my ovaries are ticked off and maybe on strike.

I'm testing about 3 times a day. With multiple OPK.

Clomid can interfere with the CBEFM. Sometimes you won't get a peak on the monitor because Clomid causes higher estrogen levels as it fakes out your FSH to keep producing. So I don't trust my monitor.

That means I'm using additional OPK to check. And boy am I checking!

I'm using the Answer test strips. ($19 for 20 tests) When those look positive, then I'm checking with the CBE digital. ($39 for 7) Um, I'm on the second box of the digis.
The trouble is the Answer brand have been looking pretty damn positive since Friday. But when I check with the digital, no go. Empty circle. No smiley face.

I have a pee stick collection. They are labeled by date so I can be even more neurotic. Yesterday, the line on the digital looked darker than it has all week.
I'm almost hopeful but it's getting so late in my cycle.

Pee Stick Collection

I actually threw some away earlier in the week. And after I admitted my problem here, I forced myself to throw some more away. It's really gross but I am compelled to compare the darkness of the lines.

I even called CBE to inquire about the lines on the digital OPK. The line closest to the pee end is the LH line. The other line is just a control line.

On the CBEFM, the line closest to the pee end is again the LH line. The other line is the estrogen.

I am seeing a darker line on the CBE Digital so hopefully that is a good sign. I have some secondary fertility signs too. Come on, ovaries!

"My Works" for my addiction

Do I chance ovulation after CD 20? My follicles are probably all over mature by now. My egg quality probably sucks.

Damn cyst. We're probably going to continue to TTC this cycle. Another miscarriage would be awful but wasting another cycle almost seems harder. Especially with BCP therapy lurking in the future if the cyst isn't gone.