I'm so frustrated with my body, with Clomid, the 9 freaking cysts, and with the damn progestin.
I stopped the progestin (oral progesterone) last week. It's similar to taking provera to start your period. I was taking the progestin to suppress my ovary function.
I started heavy bleeding late Friday night. By Saturday it had slowed down to spotting. Today nothing was really going on but I went ahead to my CD 3 u/s. The nurse said that could be "normal" for my period because of the progestin and that I've been spotting all month.
My right ovary is perfect. the two smaller cysts are gone. Great news!
Leftie is still causing problems. I still had the 28 mm cyst and the 14 mm cyst grew to 20 mm. Bad news. Those puppies are supposed to be going away!
They took my blood to see if it was a a functioning cyst. Yep, the dang thing is a follicle. My estrogen was too high for CD 3. Mine came back at 486 and normal for CD 3 is less than 40. The bleeding was probably just withdraw bleeding from the drop in progesterone.
So they think I'm ovulating! Their advice is to have sex every other day.
Yay if it wasn't CD 2freaking8.
Then I'm to come back when my period starts. The nurse didn't even have the tact to say IF my period starts.
I probably missed the ovulation window but I'm going to use an OPK later. I had my normal crampiness and sore breasts starting yesterday and just thought it was AF symptoms. I probably missed the egg already. I didn't catch how thick my lining was this morning on the u/s so who knows if pregnancy is even possible.
Another wasted cycle I have a feeling.
Oh, and for kicks I had an acupuncture session this afternoon and told him it was CD 3. They do different acu points at various times in my cycle. So who knows WTF that did.
Showing posts with label Follicle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Follicle. Show all posts
Monday, February 4, 2008
Friday, February 1, 2008
This isn't working
The two Clomid cycles have been a waste.
The first cycle the IUI was 48 hours post trigger because we did a Post Coital Test at 24 hours. Awful timing. A single IUI should be at 36 hours post trigger shot. So not much chance of that one working from the get go after the failed PCT.
The second Clomid cycle it looks like I ovulated on CD 10 based on when my period started. I didn't start using OPK that cycle until after my u/s on CD 11. My nurse had assured me that it wasn't neccessary. Of course I kicked myself for not starting it sooner. We didn't even have sex until CD 10 that cycle. My lining was thin on CD 11 so there probably wasn't a chance even if we'd had timed intercourse before. Then I ended up with 9 cysts on my ovaries which required us to take a break cycle. After enduring the progestin hell, I'm taking stock of our situation.
So, the two medicated cycles have been a big bust. That's three wasted cycles.
We TTC on our own, for three unmedicated cycles and got pregnant twice. And miscarried twice of course.
So the score is:
Medicated cycles: 0-3
Unmedicated cycles: 2-3
Hmmm? Yeah. It's like that.
We both work for the same company and I feel like we've burned up some of their good graces by all the days we've already asked off for testing and procedures. We travel for work and a doctor appointment requires a complete day off.
There's been 5 firings in the past two days so I'm afraid to push our luck and jeopardize our jobs right now by asking for 2-3 days off for monitoring and IUI. Since they want to start doing follicle checks on CD 8 because of my early ovulation on Clomid, it might take two appointments before I could trigger. Then a third day would be required for the IUI. It's just getting too stressful right now.
I'm leaning towards taking a cycle or two off to TTC on our own without Clomid or IUI. There's no medical reason that we can't. It's only my age and thus questionable eggs that are bad quality which could be the reason for the miscarriages. But my hormones and his sperm are all normal.
TTC on our own with just the CBEFM and some Presed will reduce the stress level by 90%. It will also give me time to allow the accupunture to work. I have my first appointment on Monday!
Then we can do another cycle or two of Clomid/IUI before starting injectibles. That would be around May. We plan to stop traveling in May. I may have a different job by then.
Before we do injects, I would need to be home any way because the monitoring is a lot more often. I think you almost have to go every other day as they change your injectible dosage.
So we're going back to basics. I would be thrilled to death if I got pregnant again with a sticky baby. Of course the second I get pregnant again, I'll be scared to death. But I'd rather be pregnant and scared than unpregnant without hope.
I have a baseline u/s on Monday. I'm going to spring our plan on my nurse and see what she has to say.
The first cycle the IUI was 48 hours post trigger because we did a Post Coital Test at 24 hours. Awful timing. A single IUI should be at 36 hours post trigger shot. So not much chance of that one working from the get go after the failed PCT.
The second Clomid cycle it looks like I ovulated on CD 10 based on when my period started. I didn't start using OPK that cycle until after my u/s on CD 11. My nurse had assured me that it wasn't neccessary. Of course I kicked myself for not starting it sooner. We didn't even have sex until CD 10 that cycle. My lining was thin on CD 11 so there probably wasn't a chance even if we'd had timed intercourse before. Then I ended up with 9 cysts on my ovaries which required us to take a break cycle. After enduring the progestin hell, I'm taking stock of our situation.
So, the two medicated cycles have been a big bust. That's three wasted cycles.
We TTC on our own, for three unmedicated cycles and got pregnant twice. And miscarried twice of course.
So the score is:
Medicated cycles: 0-3
Unmedicated cycles: 2-3
Hmmm? Yeah. It's like that.
We both work for the same company and I feel like we've burned up some of their good graces by all the days we've already asked off for testing and procedures. We travel for work and a doctor appointment requires a complete day off.
There's been 5 firings in the past two days so I'm afraid to push our luck and jeopardize our jobs right now by asking for 2-3 days off for monitoring and IUI. Since they want to start doing follicle checks on CD 8 because of my early ovulation on Clomid, it might take two appointments before I could trigger. Then a third day would be required for the IUI. It's just getting too stressful right now.
I'm leaning towards taking a cycle or two off to TTC on our own without Clomid or IUI. There's no medical reason that we can't. It's only my age and thus questionable eggs that are bad quality which could be the reason for the miscarriages. But my hormones and his sperm are all normal.
TTC on our own with just the CBEFM and some Presed will reduce the stress level by 90%. It will also give me time to allow the accupunture to work. I have my first appointment on Monday!
Then we can do another cycle or two of Clomid/IUI before starting injectibles. That would be around May. We plan to stop traveling in May. I may have a different job by then.
Before we do injects, I would need to be home any way because the monitoring is a lot more often. I think you almost have to go every other day as they change your injectible dosage.
So we're going back to basics. I would be thrilled to death if I got pregnant again with a sticky baby. Of course the second I get pregnant again, I'll be scared to death. But I'd rather be pregnant and scared than unpregnant without hope.
I have a baseline u/s on Monday. I'm going to spring our plan on my nurse and see what she has to say.
Monday, January 28, 2008
And the cyst saga continues...
I had my third u/s this morning for the cysts that are preventing us from TTC.
I still have 4 cysts ranging from 11 to 28 mm. It's actually a big improvement considering I started with 9 monsters. The only one that is really holding me back right now is a 28 mm. I can finally stop taking the oral progestin that has just made the last three weeks miserable.
My physical activity restrictions are lifted also. My husband still probably won't let me do any crazy lifting or work. He acts like my insides will bust out if I'm not careful.
It's funny how you always want what you can't have. Most of the time I'm rather blah about having sex unless it's sex week and we're trying to make a baby! But this past weekend I wanted to get it on so bad but I was still on restricted activity. Chris the ever safe one didn't want to break the rules. Maybe I should have gotten him drunk...
I'm going AMA (Against Medical Advice instead of the normal Advanced Maternal Age) and taking one more progestin pill and then waiting my period to show. The nurse said it should start in a few days from the drop in progesterone. We'll see how my timing works out. Hopefully my period will start between Thursday-Sunday so I don't have to miss a complete day of work for the baseline u/s. Traveling for work and under going fertility treatments is so stressful.
After my period, I'll go in for another baseline u/s (they let me come in CD 2-5) and then hopefully back on Clomid.
The nurse and doctor sounded a lot more positive that I would be taking Clomid this cycle than what I would have thought! So I hope they are right. They may be a little more lenient than what I've read. Some doctors have a cut off of 10 mm for cysts to start a medicated cycle. I had an 11 the second Clomid cycle that they approved any way.
I'm not doing too bad today. It's the EDD from my first pregnancy. I think the days leading up to today were worse than the actual day. Hopefully the free diapers and formula boxes will stop showing up in the mail soon.
Now I need AF dust. Specifically CD 1 Thursday to Sunday AF dust. :)
And here's a listing for those interested in the numbers.
Ultrasound on 1/28:
Left Ovary:
28 mm
14 mm
11 mm
Right Ovary:
14 mm
Ultrasound on 1/21:
Left Ovary:
35 mm
25 mm
23 mm
20 mm
Right Ovary:
28 mm
20 mm
Ultrasound on 1/7:
Left Ovary:
46 mm
37 mm
34 mm
33 mm
32 mm
Right Ovary:
38 mm
25 mm
21 mm
21 mm
I still have 4 cysts ranging from 11 to 28 mm. It's actually a big improvement considering I started with 9 monsters. The only one that is really holding me back right now is a 28 mm. I can finally stop taking the oral progestin that has just made the last three weeks miserable.
My physical activity restrictions are lifted also. My husband still probably won't let me do any crazy lifting or work. He acts like my insides will bust out if I'm not careful.
It's funny how you always want what you can't have. Most of the time I'm rather blah about having sex unless it's sex week and we're trying to make a baby! But this past weekend I wanted to get it on so bad but I was still on restricted activity. Chris the ever safe one didn't want to break the rules. Maybe I should have gotten him drunk...
I'm going AMA (Against Medical Advice instead of the normal Advanced Maternal Age) and taking one more progestin pill and then waiting my period to show. The nurse said it should start in a few days from the drop in progesterone. We'll see how my timing works out. Hopefully my period will start between Thursday-Sunday so I don't have to miss a complete day of work for the baseline u/s. Traveling for work and under going fertility treatments is so stressful.
After my period, I'll go in for another baseline u/s (they let me come in CD 2-5) and then hopefully back on Clomid.
The nurse and doctor sounded a lot more positive that I would be taking Clomid this cycle than what I would have thought! So I hope they are right. They may be a little more lenient than what I've read. Some doctors have a cut off of 10 mm for cysts to start a medicated cycle. I had an 11 the second Clomid cycle that they approved any way.
I'm not doing too bad today. It's the EDD from my first pregnancy. I think the days leading up to today were worse than the actual day. Hopefully the free diapers and formula boxes will stop showing up in the mail soon.
Now I need AF dust. Specifically CD 1 Thursday to Sunday AF dust. :)
And here's a listing for those interested in the numbers.
Ultrasound on 1/28:
Left Ovary:
28 mm
14 mm
11 mm
Right Ovary:
14 mm
Ultrasound on 1/21:
Left Ovary:
35 mm
25 mm
23 mm
20 mm
Right Ovary:
28 mm
20 mm
Ultrasound on 1/7:
Left Ovary:
46 mm
37 mm
34 mm
33 mm
32 mm
Right Ovary:
38 mm
25 mm
21 mm
21 mm
Monday, January 7, 2008
A freaking minefield
I have a freaking minefield in my ovaries.
This cycle has been f*'d up to say the least. And now it continues. So far I don't like my experience with medicated cycles.
Here's a brief recap: After RPL testing showed no problems except for my Advanced Maternal Age, my new RE put me on Clomid to produce more follicles and maybe even a better quality egg. The first cycle I responded beautifully, 4 potential eggs. Due to hostile CM from the Clomid, we had to switch from timed intercourse to IUI. The sperm count post wash was only 4 million. We attributed this to having sex only 24 hours before and the high fever my husband had a few days prior. Because of the sudden switch, the IUI was 48 hours post trigger which was really awful timing. No surprise, first medicated cycle BFN.
The second cycle during my baseline ultrasound, I had a small 11 mm cyst on my left ovary. My nurse okayed my to start Clomid. At my ultrasound on CD 11, I had a 35 mm cyst on old leftie. The rest of the medicated cycle was canceled, no trigger and no IUI because of the risk of ovary torsion. We were given the okay to try on our own. And so we did. I dutifully POAS trying to detect my LH surge. I saw lots of lines but the digital OPK never read positive. My chart was very inconclusive since the Clomid jacked my temps up.
Fast forward to yesterday. I started bleeding. It was light at first but got heavier to the point that I considered calling it CD 1. This was only 23 days from my last period. I'm normally a 28 day girl. But considering that this was a possible annovulatory cycle, I really wasn't expecting my period any time soon. My ovaries started getting even more painful and I went to bed early.
When I awoke this morning, I knew that my period had definitely started. We are going out of town tonight so I really needed to get into my clinic today for the baseline ultrasound. I might have stretched it a little by saying yesterday's flow was CD 1 but I hated to miss a full day's work to make it to an ultrasound later in the week. I felt pretty crappy and figured I still had a cyst or two. I knew Clomid was out this cycle. Instead of going on BCP, I planned on TTC a couple of cycles unmedicated to allow us a chance at getting pregnant and time for the cysts to go down.
I was prepared for a cyst or two and no Clomid this cycle. That was pretty much a given. Well, that one freaking cyst from CD 11 has grown and invited friends to move into the neighborhood.
I was not prepared for a freaking minefield and very serious warnings about the danger to my fertility.
Simply put, I have 9 cysts ranging from 21 mm to 46 mm. My ovaries are extremely heavy and there is a serious risk of ovarian torsion where the blood supply could get cut off to the ovaries. The ovary would then die without emergency surgery.
Left Ovary:
46 mm
37 mm
34 mm
33 mm
32 mm
Right Ovary:
38 mm
25 mm
21 mm
21 mm
My nurse thinks that since my period started early, I ovulated early. Maybe around CD 10 or 11. She said it would be very unusual for me to not ovulate on 100 mg of Clomid since I ovulate on my own.
My chart doesn't really show ovulation but I could almost see that it's possible based on how my temps all were pretty steady. All the annovulatory charts I've seen, are pretty rocky up and down.
My lining is thick so a beta was ordered. Might as well throw a chemical pregnancy into the mix. (heavy sarcasm) I'll get the results after 3 pm. If it's positive, it really can't be a good thing because of the amount of bleeding.
I'm not allowed to lift anything heavy. No jumping around or exercising. No sex.
She said any of those things could cause the ovaries to twist on the thin ligaments that hold them floating in my pelvis. So despite my intention of going unmedicated, I really didn't have much of a choice about going on Aygestin. The cysts need to stop growing ASAP. I have a follow up ultrasound in two weeks.
God help me. I just want a baby. Not a fleet of cysts trying to take over my pelvis.
Aygestin (Norethindrone Acetate)
Aygestin is a form of progestin, a synthetic substance that chemically resembles progesterone, that may be prescribed in ovulation induction therapies to inhibit ovulation and quiet the ovaries in advance of egg stimulation using injectable hormones. This "down time" helps the ovaries respond better to treatment. In much the same way that oral contraceptives prevent pregnancy by inhibiting normal ovulation, Aygestin is used in IVF and related procedures to turn off the body's natural ovulatory cycle. Side effects of Aygestin may include: abdominal pain or cramps; diarrhea; fatigue; unusual tiredness; weakness; hot flashes; decreased sex drive; nausea; trouble sleeping; depression, irritability, or other mood changes; swelling in the face, ankles, or feet; weight gain.
This cycle has been f*'d up to say the least. And now it continues. So far I don't like my experience with medicated cycles.
Here's a brief recap: After RPL testing showed no problems except for my Advanced Maternal Age, my new RE put me on Clomid to produce more follicles and maybe even a better quality egg. The first cycle I responded beautifully, 4 potential eggs. Due to hostile CM from the Clomid, we had to switch from timed intercourse to IUI. The sperm count post wash was only 4 million. We attributed this to having sex only 24 hours before and the high fever my husband had a few days prior. Because of the sudden switch, the IUI was 48 hours post trigger which was really awful timing. No surprise, first medicated cycle BFN.
The second cycle during my baseline ultrasound, I had a small 11 mm cyst on my left ovary. My nurse okayed my to start Clomid. At my ultrasound on CD 11, I had a 35 mm cyst on old leftie. The rest of the medicated cycle was canceled, no trigger and no IUI because of the risk of ovary torsion. We were given the okay to try on our own. And so we did. I dutifully POAS trying to detect my LH surge. I saw lots of lines but the digital OPK never read positive. My chart was very inconclusive since the Clomid jacked my temps up.
Fast forward to yesterday. I started bleeding. It was light at first but got heavier to the point that I considered calling it CD 1. This was only 23 days from my last period. I'm normally a 28 day girl. But considering that this was a possible annovulatory cycle, I really wasn't expecting my period any time soon. My ovaries started getting even more painful and I went to bed early.
When I awoke this morning, I knew that my period had definitely started. We are going out of town tonight so I really needed to get into my clinic today for the baseline ultrasound. I might have stretched it a little by saying yesterday's flow was CD 1 but I hated to miss a full day's work to make it to an ultrasound later in the week. I felt pretty crappy and figured I still had a cyst or two. I knew Clomid was out this cycle. Instead of going on BCP, I planned on TTC a couple of cycles unmedicated to allow us a chance at getting pregnant and time for the cysts to go down.
I was prepared for a cyst or two and no Clomid this cycle. That was pretty much a given. Well, that one freaking cyst from CD 11 has grown and invited friends to move into the neighborhood.
I was not prepared for a freaking minefield and very serious warnings about the danger to my fertility.
Simply put, I have 9 cysts ranging from 21 mm to 46 mm. My ovaries are extremely heavy and there is a serious risk of ovarian torsion where the blood supply could get cut off to the ovaries. The ovary would then die without emergency surgery.
Left Ovary:
46 mm
37 mm
34 mm
33 mm
32 mm
Right Ovary:
38 mm
25 mm
21 mm
21 mm
My nurse thinks that since my period started early, I ovulated early. Maybe around CD 10 or 11. She said it would be very unusual for me to not ovulate on 100 mg of Clomid since I ovulate on my own.
My chart doesn't really show ovulation but I could almost see that it's possible based on how my temps all were pretty steady. All the annovulatory charts I've seen, are pretty rocky up and down.
My lining is thick so a beta was ordered. Might as well throw a chemical pregnancy into the mix. (heavy sarcasm) I'll get the results after 3 pm. If it's positive, it really can't be a good thing because of the amount of bleeding.
I'm not allowed to lift anything heavy. No jumping around or exercising. No sex.
She said any of those things could cause the ovaries to twist on the thin ligaments that hold them floating in my pelvis. So despite my intention of going unmedicated, I really didn't have much of a choice about going on Aygestin. The cysts need to stop growing ASAP. I have a follow up ultrasound in two weeks.
God help me. I just want a baby. Not a fleet of cysts trying to take over my pelvis.
Aygestin (Norethindrone Acetate)
Aygestin is a form of progestin, a synthetic substance that chemically resembles progesterone, that may be prescribed in ovulation induction therapies to inhibit ovulation and quiet the ovaries in advance of egg stimulation using injectable hormones. This "down time" helps the ovaries respond better to treatment. In much the same way that oral contraceptives prevent pregnancy by inhibiting normal ovulation, Aygestin is used in IVF and related procedures to turn off the body's natural ovulatory cycle. Side effects of Aygestin may include: abdominal pain or cramps; diarrhea; fatigue; unusual tiredness; weakness; hot flashes; decreased sex drive; nausea; trouble sleeping; depression, irritability, or other mood changes; swelling in the face, ankles, or feet; weight gain.
Monday, December 24, 2007
Black Hole On Christmas Eve
My CD 11 ultrasound was today to check the follicle maturity before I triggered with Ovidrel. I knew there was a problem as soon as I saw the huge black hole on the screen.
My left ovary has a cyst that is too big for me to continue with a medicated cycle. It measures 34.6 mm. At 35 mm, I risk ovary torsion if I trigger with the Ovidrel. If you're too lazy to click, it's a serious complication that would require emergency surgery or risk losing the ovary.
The black hole monster follicle is too big and likely overmature at this point even if it still has an egg in it.
My other follicles aren't so great. I have one that maybe be mature in a few days.
So no Ovidrel to trigger ovulation and no inseminations.
Right:
13.4 mm
8.5 mm
10.3
Left:
34.6 Black Hole
19.0 Hopeful follicle to mature
12.1
Endo: 6.73 not very thick yet but I'm only on CD 11. I think it has time.
We are allowed to still TTC this cycle but no medications. No Ovidrel and no progesterone support. I'm to check for an LH surge and hope it comes in the next few days. If it doesn't happen soon that this cycle may be a complete bust. After I get an LH surge, then I'm supposed to schedule a progesterone blood draw.
We've gotten pregnant on our own 2 out of 3 cycles we TTC. So there's definitely a chance for us to be successful.
The nurse was nice. She said that IF my period started, I'll come back for another ultrasound. That was nice that she didn't say when your period starts. Every little bit of hope helps.
If the cysts are still there, then I'll go on a form of BCP to quieten my ovaries. I'm not looking forward to that. I don't have good experience with BCP helping cysts go away. In 2006, I spent close to 8 months monitoring cysts while on BCP. It took that long for them to go away. I feel like I don't have 8 months to waste now!
I'm ready to have a pity party instead of a Christmas or a birthday party. But the show must go on. At least we "celebrated" my birthday yesterday so we were able to enjoy that without any shadows over it. But it still sucks.
And my husband is secretly releaved. He was dreading doing the IUI business. Men!
My left ovary has a cyst that is too big for me to continue with a medicated cycle. It measures 34.6 mm. At 35 mm, I risk ovary torsion if I trigger with the Ovidrel. If you're too lazy to click, it's a serious complication that would require emergency surgery or risk losing the ovary.
The black hole monster follicle is too big and likely overmature at this point even if it still has an egg in it.
My other follicles aren't so great. I have one that maybe be mature in a few days.
So no Ovidrel to trigger ovulation and no inseminations.
Right:
13.4 mm
8.5 mm
10.3
Left:
34.6 Black Hole
19.0 Hopeful follicle to mature
12.1
Endo: 6.73 not very thick yet but I'm only on CD 11. I think it has time.
We are allowed to still TTC this cycle but no medications. No Ovidrel and no progesterone support. I'm to check for an LH surge and hope it comes in the next few days. If it doesn't happen soon that this cycle may be a complete bust. After I get an LH surge, then I'm supposed to schedule a progesterone blood draw.
We've gotten pregnant on our own 2 out of 3 cycles we TTC. So there's definitely a chance for us to be successful.
The nurse was nice. She said that IF my period started, I'll come back for another ultrasound. That was nice that she didn't say when your period starts. Every little bit of hope helps.
If the cysts are still there, then I'll go on a form of BCP to quieten my ovaries. I'm not looking forward to that. I don't have good experience with BCP helping cysts go away. In 2006, I spent close to 8 months monitoring cysts while on BCP. It took that long for them to go away. I feel like I don't have 8 months to waste now!
I'm ready to have a pity party instead of a Christmas or a birthday party. But the show must go on. At least we "celebrated" my birthday yesterday so we were able to enjoy that without any shadows over it. But it still sucks.
And my husband is secretly releaved. He was dreading doing the IUI business. Men!
Monday, December 17, 2007
Next cycle, please
I had my CD 4 baseline ultrasound today. I have two cysts leftover from the first Clomid cycle. I was prepared to hear that as I've been pretty crampy. One on my right ovary is 11 mm and there's another on my left. My nurse said they were small enough that they wouldn't prevent me from starting the next round of Clomid.
My next appointment is on Christmas Eve which will be for a CD 11 ultrasound. We might IUI on Wednesday and Thursday after Christmas.
Bring on the hot flashes!
My next appointment is on Christmas Eve which will be for a CD 11 ultrasound. We might IUI on Wednesday and Thursday after Christmas.
Bring on the hot flashes!
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