Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Kicks and Wishes

Okay, I'm at the point where I'm kicking myself for what we did or didn't do and wishing we'd done things differently.

I wish that when we had sex Friday night, we used the PreSeed. It was how I got pregnant twice before on our own. The PreSeed may have helped with the CM issue and Chris' count may have been okay that night. Right now I consider Friday a waste if I was hostile to the sperm and since I ovulated 3 days or so later.

I wish we had sex late Sunday instead of waiting until Monday morning. I'm really kicking myself for this one. I hated to wait Chris up at midnight which was the earliest we could have sex for the PCT. So we waited until Monday am. Then that only left 24 hours between ejaculations for the IUI. It would have given him another 7 hours to produce more sperm if we'd done it at midnight.

I wish he'd taken the Tylenol Medicine right away when I tried to give it to him.

I wish he wouldn't have gotten sick. I wish he didn't forget his vitamins last week. I wish he got more sleep at Thanksgiving. I wish he would listen to me when I tell him he needs to stop driving every 2 hours and walk around.

I wish I wasn't angry about this. I wish we weren't down to this.
I wish, I wish, I wish.

Can someone give me a big kick in the butt? Please? I hate being so negative. My friend had a lower count for her IUI but I'm hopeful for her. And here I'm being a big jackass about mine.


Will they have his eyes? said...

I wish we all weren't going through this right now.

I wish this IUI works for you.

I wish someone buys you a nice big ice cream cone tonight to make you smile :-) Oh, wait, I want one too!!

Just a girl in the south said...

I'm sorry. :( I hope the IUI works, and you get some positive things going for you! I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

Todd and Kristin said...

Why should any of us kick you in the butt when you're doing such a good job of it on your own? :( Oh honey, be sweet to yourself. Yes, it's okay to be angry & frustrated & sad & exasperated, but please be nice to our Tracy.

It'll happen someday, somehow. Just why doesn't it happen like WE want it? I guess because we aren't God. Take care of you & each other. Keep writing & keep posting - we're here for you.

Trish said...

Oh honey.. This post makes me sad.. partly for you and party because it's all so familiar.

Love you..